I have worked as an independent counsellor since 2003 and have also worked in schools and organisations with children and young people. I am a mum to a now grown up son and have experienced both the pleasures and demands of family life.
I wonder if you know what to expect from counselling? It is common for people to think that counsellors give advice, that they tell you how to solve your problems, as a doctor might diagnose a medical condition and prescribe medication. But it is different with counselling. Each person is unique and so are their circumstances. I donâ€™t have fixed ideas about how we will work together. This will evolve out of the counselling relationship. Sometimes communication is difficult particularly with children and young people, so I like to explore different ways of communicating. For example, we could work with art and play. Play for a young person is often their way of communicating. I also believe that we all have the potential to solve our own problems though this may not be easily accessible. My aim, as a counsellor, is to help you realise that potential and find your own ways of responding more effectively to the experiences that are causing you distress.
There are several possible benefits to be gained from counselling. Many people find it difficult to talk openly and honestly about whatever is troubling them. This may be because they feel they will not be understood or accepted, or because they do not want to worry family or friends. It can therefore be a great relief to tell it all to someone who will not judge you, and will not tell you to â€œpull yourself togetherâ€. Long term benefits can come from gaining a deeper understanding of your feelings, actions, beliefs, attitudes to life and your relationships with others.
This is a process of self-discovery and does not happen overnight. You may be dealing with situations, which have their roots in early experiences and will require determination and commitment to bring about deep and lasting change. You may want to focus purely on a single current problem. The choice is yours as to how far you want to use counselling.